Guilty of guilt

Today I pulled an age-old parenting weapon out of my bag and used it full-force on my 5 year old. She and I have had a long standing argument (dating back a year or so) around the issue of her winter coat. Last December, she outgrew her favorite pink winter coat, and it was bumped down to daughter #2. In its place, I bought her a lovely lavender fluffy ski type jacket. She has never truly liked it and gets angry when she sees her sister wearing the pink coat. She can't pinpoint the issue with the new coat, other than it is NOT the pink coat her sister now has.

This morning, while at my mother-in-law's house, we finally came to a head about the coat issue. She whined and cried about having to wear her coat outside to play. She didn't like it. So I did it.

I sat her down and explained to her that somewhere on this planet today, children would be cold, and some would die because they were so cold and didn't have a nice coat to keep them warm (I was thinking Pakistan...). I went on to tell her how luxurious our life truly is. In summary, I gave a 5 minute talk on the issue of poverty in the world and the inequity of wealth distribution, at a 5 year old level.

So I read TIME this week. I was heady with the "Persons of the Year" perspective - Bill, Melinda, and Bono (the new Trinity). And I was raised in the traditional CofC where guilt was the mainstay of conducting family business.

I sure hope she doesn't complain about the coat anymore. I told her I would box it up and ship to somebody who needs it and she would go cold the rest of the winter when she went outside. So please, please, please, no more complaining, or else, God send us a mild winter in Arkansas.

It's amazing when you realize you are doing the thing you swore you'd never do. Humbling too.

Weird News of the Week

People are in love with their little electronic gadgets. This just in from Blue Springs, MO.

Police said they received a call at 4:52 a.m. Friday from a Blue Springs man who said his girlfriend was having trouble breathing. When they arrived at the house they found the 24-year-old woman had a cell phone lodged in her throat.

After fighting over the phone, she tried to swallow it. Whole.

Police said an ambulance transported the woman to St. Mary's Medical Center in Blue Springs. A hospital spokeswoman said she couldn't give details about the woman's health since police have not released her identity.

But she did say the woman was extremely STUPID.

I might have been tempted to put it in an orifice, but it would not have been mine.

Eleven years ago today...

Eleven years ago today, my DH (dear husband) and I were joined in holy matrimony at the church of Christ at White Station in Memphis, TN. It was a gorgeous day - clear and crisp, not too cold (not cold enough unfortunately - I had to debate thermostat settings in the auditorium with my mother-in-law-to-be, I was hot, she was cold - the bride always wins). I felt I was the luckiest woman in the world, and still do.

Eleven years later, I can't believe where life has taken us. Here are some highlights (& low points) in our marriage.

1. The birth of Julia Rose (2000). During the c-section, TE looked over the drape to watch the surgical progress. The OB told him he didn't have to look at that part, but TE wanted to see surgery. When asked what he thought, he said the procedure looked like "skinning a deer." The look on his face when he came back from the NICU and said, "She's great, she's beautiful."

2. The loss of Hayden Adam, Julia Rose's twin (2000). Sitting with TE in the recovery room after the c-section, holding our stillborn son, was one of the most poignant memories in my life. He looked like his daddy.

3. The birth and illness of Stella Caroline (2002). TE was old hat at surgery the 2nd time. Sitting next to her in the NICU at Children's, praying for her healing, rejoicing at seeing her open her eyes again, and her complete healing.

4. The illness and death of Jackson Thayne (2002). Sitting together in the NICU at Children's, holding our son as he died, begging God to heal him. TE refused to leave his side, even for the shepherds from Downtown to pray with us. He looked like his daddy and big sister Julia Rose.

5. Our many trips hiking and camping in CO. My personal favorite was a car-camping trip that ended up with our sleeping under a tarp. The tent didn't make it into the car. It rained. We had the dog. On a leash. Around TE's leg.

6. My other favorite camping trip. Rampart Range Road, drunk rednecks (yes, they live in CO too) with loud music. Us huddled in our tent with my big mouth, which I used to ask them, not politely, to turn down the music. We had to leave before they killed us.

7. The loss of our fathers. Both of our fathers have passed on since our marriage. Heart disease (mine) and lung cancer (his).

8. Cutting down our Christmas trees in Colorado. This is legal and fun.

9. Gardening - corn, peas, tomatoes, beans, eggplants, cucumbers, pumpkins, gourds, lettuce, spinach, basil, rosemary, parsley, chive, squash - we've tried it all, just about. Zucchini so big it had to be composted with a machete.

10. Loving and working with each other through grad schools, crazy work schedules, uncertainty about jobs, moving across the country twice, infertility, children, crazy families, dogs, cats, painting and many other numerous home projects, 2 houses, illness, death, surgeries, etc.

And to think it all started when Bud Lambert presented us to the audience as "Mr. & Mrs" and I fell down the steps. Who knew?

This song by Van Morrison hangs on my office wall, along with a much older photo of him. I find the words uplifting and refreshing. Have a great day!

Full Force Gale

Like a full force gale

I was lifted up again

I was lifted up again by the Lord

And no matter where I roam

I will find my way back home

I will always return to the Lord

In the gentle evening breeze

By the whispering shady trees

I will find my sanctuary in the Lord

I was headed for a fall

The I looked up and saw the writing on the wall

Like a full force gale

I was lifted up again

I was lifted up again by the Lord

I was headed for a fall

The I looked up and saw the writing on the wall

In the gentle evening breeze

By the whispering shady trees

I will find my sanctuary in the Lord

And no matter where I roam

I will find my way back home

I will always return to the Lord

Like a full force gale

I was lifted up again

I was lifted up again by the Lord

Lyrics by Van Morrison

DISH Network Rocks...

While flipping through the SIRIUS channels on our DISH network, my husband found that there is an all Springsteen channel AND an all Stones channel. Life is cooler than I originally thought. Now if Tony Soprano could just his act together and get back on the tube...Sunday nights were made for him!

Breakfast with Santa

Today we had our annual Breakfast with Santa. My beloved fixed 24 lbs. of hand-formed sausage patties. The girls slept in late, meaning my oldest waited until 7:15 am to wake me. She and I had to make her letter for Santa Claus, which I secretly steal back from Santa after they walk off. She tells what me she wants, I spell it for her, and she writes it down. A slow process to say the least.

Her list consisted of a pink and purple unicorn (I'm assuming she meant stuffed, not live), a My Little Pony Barn, and a doggy wash station. None of this is what I have actually purchased. My younger daughter wants a Barbie, Barbie house, Barbie doll case and Barbie shoes. See above, with the exception of a Barbie case. Barbie shoes are like a little nail going into your bare foot at 11:00 pm when checking to see if the kids are still breathing.

I can remember writing a few letters to Santa, but I was never a true believer. At age 2.5 yrs, I asked my mother if reindeer could really, really fly She was afraid if she said yes, I would find out later she lied about Santa, and was probably lying about Jesus too. She swore me to secrecy where other children were concerned. I remember sitting in 3rd grade feeling very smug about my "insider knowledge." What idiots you are, I thought!

I find it difficult to lie to my own kids about Santa now. We are keep up the pretenses right now, but I may crack in a year or two.

Weird News of the Week

In Sunday's Arkansas Democrat-Gazette (if only it had taken place in Arkansas...)

Daniel Zeisler, who pleaded no contest to manufacturing methamphetamine, was sentenced to five months in prison and three years of probation after police say he tried to extract methamphetamine from his own urine after smoking the drug in a San Francisco hotel room.

People, have we come to this?

Dexter the Dog

After reading Mike Cope's column about dogs, I decided to post about our sweet dog Dexter! I posted this over on Mike's blog, and just copied it here.

We adopted a 5 year old golden retriever named Dexter in 1996. He was unique - he had 3 legs (missing a front due to a run-in with a car). He came into our lives B.K. (before kids) in Colorado. We loved him although he was obviously a Colorado fan, and we were Colorado State fans. We did have the Broncos in common.

Dexter and I made it to just above 13000 ft on Mt. Bierstadt, while my husband and Bonnie, our other dog, made it almost to the top. Pretty good for an out-of-shape woman and a 3-legged dog!Dexter slept on the couch, our bed, wherever he could to be off the floor. He weighed 90 lbs! He was part billy-goat - eating everything he could. He repeatedly ate our youngest daughter's pacifiers.

This summer, when he was 14.5 yrs old, the pain of his arthritis got to be too much for him. He just quit walking (hobbling truly at his age). At 90 lbs, we just couldn't carry him. We made the very difficult decision to euthanize him. His ashes are with us, as we can't bear to bury him, then move later on.

I truly think God sent Dexter to us. He was a great companion, faithful to a fault, and an adoring fan of my husband. We miss him so much! Our daughters talk about how Dexter is in heaven, has 4 legs now, and is running without pain. I believe them!